The Rollercoaster

I can't decide, or maybe it's just that I don't want to, or won't.

As the one single-family house I was interested in is no longer an option I've been avoiding figuring out the house buying situation. Before I started looking at single family homes I was pretty set on getting a townhouse or a condo and had found a fairly large one in a location I really loved. Since I have friends who already live in the complex it was brought to my attention that there was a possibility of there being an assessment (fancy word for a requirement for the owners to cough up money) on new siding. It would probably be somewhere in the area of $9K per owner to pay for the siding. Hearing that, I crossed that place off my list.

Well, I found out over the weekend that the HOA voted and decided to just re-paint the siding which would not be an additional cost. This was exciting to me because really the $9K was the main thing holding me back. So I decided yesterday I 'might' be ready to make an offer. Can you see how wishy washy I am on this whole thing? I'm driving myself crazy.

At 7:30 p.m. last night I talked to my parents on the phone, (they are supportive of whatever I want to do) and basically told them I was ready to make an offer. Two hours later I'm talking to one of my friends who already lives in the complex and she is listing off all the issues she had with her home and specifically issues she has with the HOA. They are seemingly small. But are they still big enough to change my mind yet again? I don't know.

Then, there is this anti-debt mindset I have that pings me every few days with thoughts of "you don't have to buy now" "you have a place to live" "you can save a lot of money not buying...and travel" "there will still be houses next year you don't have to buy because the stimulus package will pay you $8K". Seriously, I am driving myself crazy.

I cry out to God to close doors and open others and send me wise counsel...now I just need to have patience and let Him work how He works, in His own time. The message in church on Sunday was about "your will Father...not mine". I need to, at every step of this process, try to discern what God's will is.

Back the assessment...if they keep painting and not replacing the siding (which apparently they already did 6 years ago) there's still going to eventually come a time when the request money for new siding. Here's the question I have for the HOA though..."if this issue came up 6 years ago why didn't they start saving money then to be used on the new siding instead of again figuring out if they can request it from the condo owners".

I'm not decided and I'm not enjoying the roller coaster anymore and I LOVE roller coasters. More to come, my realtor probably thinks I'm crazy too.

Playlist Boredom

For those of you who workout to music (run, cardio or strength training), what are some of your favorite musical finds?

I'm needing some new options to add to my playlist and have an iTunes gift card just waiting to be spent.

House Update

Earlier today, I was ready to put in an offer on a house (no fool'in).

It is a unique (unique as it can be in a cookie cutter, built after 2000, housing development) and looked like it was brand new. It was actually built in 2003. It isn't necessarily in the area of town I thought I wanted to be but it's close to my aunt and uncle and since the rest of my family lives over 700 miles away...it is likely I'd be calling my aunt and uncle to help me out from time to time, so why not make it a bit easier for them.

Within the last week I switched from thinking I could only go for a condo or townhouse to being open to a single family home to finding one I loved and could actually see myself living in to finding out it had 3 offers before me (not the only person who could see myself living there I guess) and went under contract this morning. Did I mention this house buying thing is a roller coaster?

I see this as one of the ways God can speak to me through this process though. Unless the Lord picks my house, I pick in vain (adapted slightly from Psalm 127:1).

My Chocolate Nemesis

If you have read posts on this blog before it is not a secret that I'm working on developing better fitness and nutrition with the hope that weight loss would be the outcome. Not in a vain I'll never be pretty till I lose [insert number here] pounds kind of way but in a I want to be a healthy and active adult so as I age I continue to be healthy and active kind of way.

As much as I try to conquer the hold that chocolate and sugar has on me...it's winning. There's one desk in particular that ALWAYS has the chocolate I like and let's just say I don't take one piece per day, let's say some days I take 5 pieces (or more). I never feel good about myself on those days and maybe that's why I do it. The sad part is that I of course want to hide my inability to control myself around chocolate so I only take pieces when this employee is away from their desk and then I quickly eat it at my desk and get rid of the evidence. I'm well aware that this is problem and maybe even a disorder but I have no idea how to 'stop the insanity'.

I value the suggestions I get from friends and family and the information I read in magazines and on-line around this issue (it's not unique to me). But recently I was introduced to an on-line study that portrays overeating (and eating in secret) as a spiritual issue. I'm on day 9 of the 60 day study and I'm starting to think it really is a spiritual issue. Even though, I'm not yet certain whether completing the study will help me conquer this nemesis...I'm still hopeful.

Married Friends and Almost

I have a lot of married friends and a significant number of friends almost married. Although I am not yet in either of those categories I like to listen to sermons and read articles and books about having a good solid marriage. Truth is, some of my friends have struggled in their marriages and even gone through divorces. I guess that is one of the things that scares me about marriage is how hard it can be...

I was listening to a sermon series by Andy Stanley last night on "Staying in Love". He talked about love being a verb and how every single day we have to say [to our spouse] "today it is about you". Everyday! How can I actually put that into action when I know that my selfishness might come out too?

In Andy's specific words "Falling in love is about having a pulse; staying in love is about having a plan. Falling in love involves attraction, staying in love involves action."

A plan of how your going to show love to your spouse and what you're going to do when you aren't feeling so loving and actions to back up the love. Things I want to remember and start working on even now.

Yes, marriage is hard (I think most people would agree to that) but we obviously believe it can work and be great or we wouldn't keep striving and hoping for it.

That Is The Question

To buy or not to buy...

I know I just got done posting about the exciting adult step I am taking in buying a house. I'd like to take a moment to now post about the internal, emotional struggle weighing me down.

I worked hard to get myself out of debt...paid off my car, paid off my college education (I went to a private Christain school, not cheap) and paid off my credit card debt. After the years of conquering the debt were done, I was supposed to start saving-for a house or that next car, or to keep up with my love of travel. Well, I didn't do that very well (instead I traveled, got a personal trainer and shopped when I wanted to). So, although I have a down payment for a house, it is a small down payment and it wouldn't leave the Dave Ramsey recommended 3 month nest egg in my savings. Just writing that makes me think I know my own answer...but it's not that cut and dry really.


I want to own my own house, I want to paint and decorate and organize, I want to drive into my garage and walk right into my house and I want to be able to host friends and family.

Now is a good time, but is it a good time for me? I'm all over the map. I can convince myself either way. Friends and family have no idea that their input and comments run over and over in my head. I'm praying the Lord shows me what the right decision is...and until the decision is made I will probably continue to be all over the map.

Go ahead weigh in...